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Thursday, December 13, 2007

GordWatch: Hail, Nero!

Gord had been disappointing me lately, with his bland little columns on council and the symphony, but give him time, Windsor, he never lets you down for long, and today's confuzzled clusterf*ck of a column is a stark reminder of that.

To start, he talks about a former Windsorite who moved to Toronto [haven't we all?] who returned home for a visit and mused over wings at Rock Bottom [name dropping is how Gord keeps it real. Or how he gets his meals for free, you make the call] that despite rumours of its demise, Windsor's actually thriving! Sayeth the man:

Think about the spending power that's still here, I told my dinner companion. Think of all those folks still earning in excess of $34 an hour, at least until that next round of Big Three negotiations. Think how many people have fat Christmas bonuses burning holes in their jeans. And think how many newly minted pensioners have hit the streets with $80,000 retirement incentives and $30,000 car allowances putting a little more ho-ho-ho in the festive season.

So as long as you're like, 60+ and worked for the Big Three, aces! If you're -30, pack your bags, kids!

Surprisingly, Gord doesn't fail to realize this, summing up the aforementioned point, as well as acknowledging the thunbering beast known as China chasing down the North American auto market. Yet he offers no comment on it. Is that not his job, as the "provocative city columnist?" He merely mentions that Windsorites have their wallets open this holiday season, despite the ticking clock that continues to count down on its stable industrial economy. Is this really the time for subtlety, Gord? You've never had a problem shooting your mouth off before, why the light touch now? An early present for your readership? They don't deserve it. The times they are a'changing, and it's your job as a flipping journalist to make sure people realize it.

For tuning up his fiddle while Rome burns around him, Gord gets a perfunctory three heads,
out of five.

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